Tuesday, June 5, 2012

Some People Can't Take a Hint

     I don't know about you, but the day the authorities remove me from somewhere will be the last day I show my face in that place ever again.  Just today I dropped in, uninvited, on my sister Alyssa because Aston just had to share a box of donuts with Phoenix.  I must confess that a piece of me was worried that I was keeping Alyssa from her plans and ruined her day during the entire visit.  Good Mrs. Witherell would never make me feel unwelcome in her home (she just pours bottomless cups of tea and coffee) so I have no way of knowing if I've ticked her off or not and I will return. Her sister Mean Old Mrs. Jones however once had an uninvited guest removed from her home, and I think that just screams "You're not wanted here".  So tell me why I looked out of my back door and saw the offender sitting on my back deck looking in at me a couple of days ago.  Creep!

     It all started about a year back when I would randomly notice this jerk in my back yard.  I'm a sissy and I despise confrontation, so I'd just pretend not to notice him and hope he'd go away.  Then I spoke with my neighbors who mentioned seeing him sitting on their front porch.  It all really became too much though when I took Aston into the bathroom for his morning pee and glanced into the bathtub while lifting the toilet seat  and saw him sitting IN THE TUB just smiling up at me.  I was so freaked out I just backed Aston out of the bathroom, shut the door, and had Aston pee in the front yard as I loaded up the other kids in the van to get the heck out of dodge while Ariel obeyed my wishes and called for professional help even though he was feeling particularly heroic that morning and really wanted to throw the bum out himself.

     Ariel stayed in the house while the villain was removed.  I guess the men who came to our rescue had a bit of a time getting him out.  He put up a good fight and even relieved himself in the very bathtub where my precious children take their tubbies.  Am I crazy, or is it outrageous that this creature has the nerve to darken my doorstep after all of that?  I was quite surprised to see him back again and rather regret that he was let go with a mere slap on the wrists last summer.  I wonder what lengths I will have to go to to get the point through his thick skull. You're Not Wanted Here!!!!!

There he is
just sitting in my tub
like he can!

1 comment:

  1. oohhhoohaaahhhaaaheeeeheheheh!!!OMG, You had me for a minute. I was wondering where this story was going. Multiple faces came to my mind!! Rocky Racoon,that rascally rodent! Get a RESTRAINING ORDER!