Monday, April 15, 2013

A Spoonful of Sugar...or Explosives

In every job that must be done
there is an element of fun
You find the fun...
And Snap,
the job becomes a game.
~Mary Poppins

     I've heard Julie Andrews convey that message countless times.  In my youth it really just aggravated me.  There I was, snap, snap, snapping away at my bed, dolls, games, and clothes with no results while she and those bug eyed Banks children had their things cleaned up perfectly with the same moves.  Now, as an adult trying to instill some form of responsibility in my children, I see the value of the message (if you are able to take the "snap" a little less literally).  For example, had I asked Aston and Clara if they wanted to clean the toilets this weekend they would have said, "Cleaning makes me tired" and stomped off, slamming the door on the way, respectively.  However, when I asked, "Who wants to make Potty Bombs?", they were pushing and shoving to be the first one to the bathroom.  Armed with vinegar and baking soda Clara and Aston made fizzley explosions in one toilet after another cheering all the while (the urinal was by far the most exciting) and I was left with sparkling white toilet bowls.  So, sing away Mary...

Just a spoonful of sugar helps the medicine go down
In a most delightful way!

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Out of the Mouth of Aston

This gloomy Saturday morning was brightened by some good old fashioned Aston nonsense.  Once, after smashing his head into Clara's he came to me very concerned and asked, "Mommy, where is my soft spot?", and again when I heard him say a rather disappointed,"Awww, we are uh-sposed to fart together", to his big sissy.  I am taking him into public and the day is young.  I'm sure this is just the beginning!

Monday, April 8, 2013

Shave and a Haircut

     Enzo has never enjoyed having his hair cut.  He's looked like a lost member of Spinal Tap for most of his life.  My feelings on this are along the lines of; it is his head let it look how he wants it to.  Only twice have
I wondered if this was the best approach.  Once was over the summer when I was surprised to see Enzo climb up the ladder in the deep end of the swimming pool and reveal a magenta bikini.  I soon realized that for the last hour I had been dutifully supervising some girl I did not know and actually had no idea where my son  was.  The second time was just last night when Ariel was all set to leave Enzo behind at the restaurant we had eaten dinner in because he assumed his first born son was the little Chinese woman who worked there when he glanced at the boy.  Perhaps it is time to try to sway Enzo's hairstyle choices before we end up losing the kid.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

Never Bring Your Children Shopping With You

     As a rule I do my grocery shopping when my children are in school or when their father is home to watch them.  Children and retail do not mix.  There is no shopping cart big enough for what your children want and if you, like me, you have a predetermined weekly grocery budget, you will find yourself dropping a few pounds during the week you only had enough money for a Lego Star Wars Battle Pack, Super Mario Karts 104, puffy paints, rainbow socks, three birdhouse kits, assorted Webkinz, miniature pink cowboy boots, gel pens, light up propellers, the entire Nerf line, and four ring pops.
     Unfortunately, there are times when the public school shuts its doors to the children at the same time my baby daddy is swamped with work and our cabinets have tumble weed rolling through them.  Yesterday was    a triple fail such as this here at Casa de Jones.  Yesterday taught me that there is yet another reason not to bring your children shopping with you.  Time together in the car driving to the store can present a problem.  Without the distraction of television, toys, bikes, and swing sets, conversations happen that maybe shouldn't.
     During our twenty minute drive Aston had time to reflect on a memory of his.  "Mom," he said, "I remember when Dorothy was in your belly and you were so fat".
     And Enzo had time to observe, " never quite got over that, did ya Ma?"
     There is no good reason to bring your children shopping with you.