What Did You Say???

Here is a sampler comprised of a few of the things the kids said  this week that forced me to work very hard at not laughing in their faces.  


While swimming in the pool with the whole 10 and under crowd I over heard Aston announce

I have three penises.

I have no idea what the context was but try as I may I can't think of any time when that would make sense.

We were in the van with the cousins and Troy was giving a lecture on the different types of ammo used in different weapons.  When he mentioned assault rifles Clara got all excited and Oooh Oooh Ooohed because she knew the answer to this one.  Troy called on her and she absolutely busted out with

Assault rifle uses salt instead of gunpowder.

When Enzo wakes up in the morning he limps and shuffles about the house scratching at himself with a hair-do that would make Albert Einstein proud.  The other morning he completed this picture with the statement

I think I have scurvy.

Aston was playing video games with Ariel on a particularly hot evening.  They weren't wearing their shirts, desperately trying to keep cool.  Aston glanced over at Daddy and said

Hmmm, I didn't know you had boobs.

While we are on the subject of topless Joneses, Clara was examining her robust baby sister who was wearing just a diaper, then came to me very concerned.

Mom, Dorothy has four boobs.

Aston, Dorothy, and I were sitting on the couch bright and early in the morning.  Aston was trying to convince me that he had done no harm in waking Dorothy so early in the morning, after several warnings that he had better not.

Aston: Look Mom, Dorothy is smiling at me.

Me: Of course she is Sweetie.  She really loves you.

She thinks you're awesome.

Aston: I am.